Chaos describes this morning in the K-1 classroom.
I felt anxiety going in there, more anxiety than usual. Our K-1 teacher moved just this weekend, leaving me and another helper to handle the five and six year old energies. Don't get me wrong, I love working with them. They are so affectionate and so full of life, but also so independent and energetic.
"They will eat you alive, if you let them," remarked a mother and former K-1 helper. This comment seems to accurately sum up my experience today. The key: DON'T LET THEM EAT YOU! The former helper/mother reminded me that I must command their attention. After today's chaos, I feel far from being able to actualize this. Maybe that's the issue. Self-confidence. The thing is, even if I don't feel self-confident to command attention, I must play that role -- the self-confident commanding woman role.
We talked about endurance today in the K-1 class. It seems appropriate to not only teach about endurance, but to apply this lesson. Endure, and learn through practice and perseverance how to commmand attention.
It seems that life tends not to present us with a platter of situations that we feel aply prepared for. Rather, we often feel ill equipped. We may lack the confidence to pursue what should be done or what we desire to do. We allow fear to dictate, rather than our hearts and minds. Nonetheless, the question is not whether we feel fear. Ask anyone who has done anything courageous whether they felt fear. Most likely, the answer will be, "Yes." They stepped anyway. Faith requires us to step out, as Moses stepped out and led the Israelites even though he felt ill equipped. When called, Moses doubted. "Me? But I stumble and stutter. Certainly not me. He is better at that." I feel that I should not be so concerned with each week, but rather go, play the confident woman role (no matter how I perceive myself), seek to learn, trust where the Lord has placed my feet, and have fun being there!